Tis the season...... ..


So far December has been very hectic and stressful.....and not for the normal reasons it would be. ..especially so early into the month.  It's not due to the crowded shopping malls and Christmas shopping and bills all at once...ofcourse I still have to deal with those but I also have other mishaps to deal with as well. Lets start with the fact that on the way to the kids Christmas concert my car broke down then add on top of that school tuition for all 3 children (we live in a really bad school district)  past due and needs to be made current or their classes will be interrupted.  I have utilities and credit card bills and Birthdays are coming up and all  these things are hitting me all at once.

Not to mention I've been fighting with my husband over some of these issues and to his credit he has been extremely forgiving because I will admit that I have been aloof with my spending and payment habits. (NO...im NOT buying expensive bags or jewelry ...lets just leave it at that)   The moral of my story is that this time of year and all of the struggles my family and I have encountered has reminded me of what the true meaning of this holiday season is.....I know I know..sooooo cliche. ...ita not about material things....its about miracles like the miracle of the birhth of chirst....its the little miracles we see every day. ...a kind smile. ...the help of a stranger....  like the one I got from two different men at the gas station I ended up at when I got stranded when my car broke down.   They may not have been able to fix the problem but they tried their best. I truly appreciated it. Like my neighbor who took time away from his family two days in a row to help my husband and I out. Also my boss who offered to give me a loan and a raise that I did not earn but she knew it would help in my time of need even though the office is not doing well at this time either. .....this is the true definition of the holiday spirit.
  I am truly thankful for these people my and my friends and especially my  family.  I am so fortunate to have them in my life and at times I may feel I don't deserve them but I will cherish them always and forever and I will strive to provide the best life I can for them.

I pray that this Holiday season brings you joy and happiness. I pray that you look at your loved ones and smile and are thankful for the joy that they bring you.

November already gone???

This month FLEW by!!!

 I'm very pleased so far with my nail progress.  Ive been using a polish by Sally Hansen and also continually changing my polish so I wouldn't bite my nails. The results have been great. Its about a month and a half in between both pictures and im happy with the results. I'll be posting pics of different nail designs to come. I always feel more feminine when my nails are in good condition but thats just me.

Alot of chaos at work as one of my full time co-workers has started her maternity leave early.  I in turn have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off!!! Between baby shower, working extra houta, parent teacher conferences,  running errands with the kids, and thanksgiving festivities I truly dont know where the month went.

Ive been talking to a close friend of mine and we both discussed the possibility of starting a business venture together.  Why can't we be in charge of our destinies?  Why can't we have a larger piece of the American pie? There's nothing stopping us or getting in the way but ourselves.  Hopefully I will have more news to share in the future about this.  Keeping fingers crossed......

December is here tomorrow and I am determined to decorate and continue baking and cooking to make this an awesome holiday.  Its always been a great time but as I've mentioned in previous posts, I reallywant to make more of an effort and make memories for my family.

Lastly the weight loss has been at at a satnd still. Tomorrow I am starting my cleanse and I also ordered a weight loss supplement called Jadera.  I tried it a few years ago and it worked well but just like anything else its not a long term solution.  I do feel that its a great starting point for me now because I have more knowledge and have a better game plan.   I will post before and after pics next month and fill in the details of what I've done and any progress I have made.

My birthday is next month and I hope that this will be a great year.

Update....sort of ....

So the last week was pretty quiet as quiet can go in my life.  Just work and sleepovers and bday parties at chuck e cheese.  I have to update that the weightloss was a complete and total failure! ! I didn't put in any effort after the first two days so obviously it didnt work.  Im just finding it hard to decide on what route to take...wether its a cleanse or atkins or appetite suppressant or juicing.  Ofcourse with the holidays coming and all the yummy food that will follow I'm even considering holding off until the new year.  I'm very torn about the "New Years Resolution" idea of weightloss versus the "Stop the excuses and start THIS MINUTE" approach.  My birthday is next month and I will be turning 33 so I could use that as a mini goal to see if I can make any progress. We'll see....

Meanwhile. ...I have been cooking more. (Which might add to my weight problem lol)   I haven't done anything serious just packaged cookies and cupcakes and easy stuff like sausage and peppers. Its such a great way to bond with my kids and get them involved. But it has definitely lit the fire to get me cooking and baking more. I was a novice fondant decorator but I really enjoyed it and was so proud of myself so maybe I'll start again and take more pictures of my endeavor.  I'm eager to start trying new recipes to see what I'm really capable of.  Maybe I'll sign up for a few beginners classes.  I'm starting to think anything is possible but I have to TRY!

(Don't mind my little one's messy hair...it was the weekend...cut me some slack! lol)

  Finally dyed my hair back to black/brown and started growing my nails.  I'm also going to try and step up the home décor.  It's a struggle with working full time but I want my husband and kids to come home and feel like their wife/mom has tried to build a clean and loving and warm and also FESTIVE environment that they can be proud of. 

(I couldn't get the same lighting, sorry)

   I have so many ideas and goals to meet and i think my problem is knowing where to start.  I love to see everyone else's pictures and ideas for decorating and holiday comfort foods. Although October is still my favorite month. ..November and December are right behind. Especially this year because I am taking such an active approach to everything. I'm not just sitting back and doing the minimum... .ok so I am absolutely doing less than the minimum with my weight loss but that's another story,  as for everything else I am definitely trying harder. I want to take pictures of the things I'm doing and be proud. If I can inspire someone else by what I've achieved on my own that would be a bonus!! I'm looking forward to it!! :D

Weekend Family Fun.

It was a beautiful day on Saturday and we had to take advantage of it!  We went to Eisenhower Park and had a great time.   We also took a walk at the Veterans Memorial area where they also had the World Trade Center Memorial and we finally took a walk around the lake and the Rose garden.  It turned out to be a gorgeous day. 

Small steps.

So its been an interesting past few days. I was sick for a few days last week and had to take a few days off from work. I was stuck in bed and aside from watching tv all I did was read different blogs.  I had a lot of time to think about what I hope to achieve in my life and my goals.   Now I mentioned in one of my previous posts that I needed to get started and be active in pursuing the things I want.  Truth is that I have been making small steps.   No groundbreaking moves but still something is something right?

I'm putting in more effort in keeping in touch with friends.  I am trying to be more involved with the kids schools as far as volunteering with other parents.  I have been trying to be more put together in what I wear and not being lazy.  I think if I start putting in more effort it will eventually come easier to me.  I'm trying to step out my comfort zone in all aspects of my life.  I will start baking and cooking with new recipes.  I used to love baking and decorating cakes with home made fondant but I just gave it up.  I think its time to start again.

 I'll be making more posts with more focus, details, pictures and reviews.  Hopefully when I look back in a few months there will be a significant change.  Making my husband and kids happy are my first and most important concern but I want to make myself happy too.  They are my greatest loves and accomplishment but I want to offer them more. I want to make them and myself proud. 

I believe it when people say that you're never too old to achieve your dreams.  I tell my kids that if they work hard then there is nothing they can not do.  So now its time for me to prove it to myself.

Have a great week...I know I will!!! :D

When Mom is Sick....

When Mom is sick........
When Mom is sick the house gets turned upside down
No one knows where anything is
Little mountains of mess appear everywhere and dont disappear on their own
Everyone decides they must all meet in moms room while she tries to sleep
Questions must be asked and only mom knows the answer
Homework doesn't get started until mom reminds them
They look at mom and she doesn't look too good
Its the day the siblings all get along and try to keep the noise down
My oldest daughter tries to do the laundry
My son cleans the kitchen
They go to sleep early
Mom is happy that they tried
Mom is happy that she is needed
Mom has to get better soon
They are the best medicine

Halloween!!!!

So Halloween is by far my favorite holiday.   I know there's no presents like Christmas but I love love LOVE this month.   Decorating the house and yard, scary movies,  ghots and paranormal shows, costumes for the kids and have I mentioned the FOOD!!! lol.

Ok...so I know my last post was about weight loss and I still have to update you on that at the end of 30 days....but for now lets just push that aside.   The food is fabulous!!  Funnel cakes, corn on the cob, pumpkin anything!!  CANDY!! Need I say more??? lol

Basically fall is my favorite season. I love the weather....not too cold but you can throw on your favorite boots and dress in layers! So many more outfit options than summer in my opinion.  The leaves turn beautiful colors. I get to snuggle with my kids under blankets on the couch and watch out favorite shows like The Walking Dead, Ghost Adventures, Halloween Wars on the Food Network, etc.  (don't judge me) :P 

Had a great time taking the kids to Eisenhower Park in Westbury for a fall fair.  It was very reasonably priced  compared to other well known places.  And it had everything we wanted.  Food, bouncy ride, haunted house, a little maze, pumpkin decorating and face painting.  They even showed a movie while we sat on bales of hay.  It wasn't packed and very close to home.  Definitely worth a look.

My husband and I decided to check out a more grown up version of a haunted house in Wading River called the  Darkside Haunted House.  It was definitely a trip to get there and the drive alone added to the excitement and atmosphere of the evening.  It was literally in the middle of NO WHERE!! No street lights, winding roads and at night it was pitch black!  The line wasn't too bad and the coast was 20 dollars for both attractions,  the haunted grave walk and haunted house.  It was DEFINITELY worth it!!  We had a fantastic time!! 

Looking ahead the rest of this month there is still much more fun to be had! Halloween parties and costume shopping. :) Also hoping to check out the Jack-O-Lantern display at Westbury Gardens.  From the online pictures it looks amazing! Hope everyone enjoys getting into the spirit of things this month and stays safe!

A new me!

So it's about that time of year when my clothes are getting tighter, my skin is breaking out from eczema, my asthma is at its worst.  I'm just unhappy with my weight all around.  Yes,  I've tried it all....master cleanse, eating healthy with exercise, weight loss pills, no carb all protein,  you name it I've probably tried it.  Now I will be completely honest...I've gotten great results...but as all the critics will be sure to say the "fad diets" don't work...at least not permanently.  What I will say is that they can be a great starting off point.  My problem is that I never continue eating healthy.  I am either at one extreme or the other.  I'm either super healthy and wont indulge in any treats at all and I'm MISERABLE or I'm binging out on bags of chips, packs of cookies, slices of cakes, a multitude of donuts...you catch my drift right?  (nom nom nom)   Oh yea...and STILL MISERABLE.

Now that I'm blogging I feel that its the perfect time to re-start with my weight loss.  I'm going to document this venture and hopefully this will keep me accountable and motivate me to stick to the program.  I'll check in after a week and list what I've done and any progress.  I'm going to try just eating healthy(healthier) not over doing it with the junk but not being a total scrooge either. Just portion control and being smarter about my choices.  No starving. No skipping meals.  I'll combine this with the 30 day ab/arm/squat challenges.  Wish me Luck!!

Starting Stats

Height 5'6"
Weight 179.2 lbs - OMG :/
Goal Weight  155 lbs

Time to get started

So its been a long week.  Running around with the kids, working,  home, etc.  But the real reason its been such a LONG week for me is the fact that this week I've been confronted by death and what it means in many different ways.  You know the saying that death comes in threes? Well for me this week it has.  Sadly a neighbor and close friend of my husband just lost his brother to a car accident this past Saturday.  Then on Monday I get the news that a classmate of my youngest daughter in pre-k, also died in a separate car accident.   Finally on Tuesday, the day I randomly decided to call my sons high school guidance counselor and leave a message,  I come home to get the news that she was not in the office because her husband passed away that morning. I feel horrible for all these different families and what they are going through.

All this week I've been hearing different views on life and death and how important it is to go after what you want while you have the chance.   Also about how important it is to tell people how much you love them when you can because there is never any guarantee that  you will live to see another day.  These are all things I know I have heard in the past and I try my best to at least make sure I tell my husband and children that I love them so much every day.

It does however make me realize that although sometimes I feel as if I have alot on my plate,  I can still do so much more. At least I think I have the potential to achieve much more and to be a better version of myself.   I joke often about "super moms". These are the women who seem to do everything so well and organized and stylish.  Whose children look like they are ready for a fashion shoot and appear to be headed to any ivy league college on a full scholarship.   I look at myself and try to console myself by saying how much more "realistic" I am and how I'm doing a damn good job especially considering my background and circumstances.

What I've come to realize after this week however is that I am capable of doing much more.  Ive been making excuses for not doing all the things I want and should be doing.  I have done a good job but I want to look back at my life and say to myself that I did a GREAT job.  I still have goals and dreams and I want to make myself proud.  I know my husband and kids are already proud of me but I have something to prove to myself. I really have to appreciate everything I have but make a real effort to improve on myself and my surroundings and what I have to offer.  Most of all I need to stop taking time for granted.  I cant put things off for later.  I have to get started now.  So off I go.  Talk to you soon!

Very first post!!

So today is the day I have decided to put the pen to paper (so to speak) and start "blogging"!  I will be honest....I haven't done much research other than reading a few blogs, so I'm not quite sure what  I should be doing or what to expect from this but I had to give it a try.

So I've read a few blogs here and there and I've noticed a trend.  Most of them seem to have something to offer.   They promote themselves as "frugal this" or "beauty guru" that or my favorite is the "stylish but on a budget" type.  Now dont get me wrong. ..I LOVE those sites...they inspire me. ..but I am in no way shape or form here to claim to be any one of the above....well...not yet anyway...who knows...maybe someday in the distant future I too will have the super mom powers of being flawless with my wardrobe, queen of d.i.y. party decorating, holding down my full time job and making it home with enough time to prepare an organic gourmet meal from scratch. ...but for now I'm happy making it through the day without landing in jail from my road rage and not emotionally scaring my children for life.

Now why did I want to start a blog you ask? Answer is...I dont know.  I guess the easiest way for me to rationalize it is to say that I have alot on my mind.  I may not be the super mom like I mentioned above but my plate still seems pretty full.

As I mentioned earlier I was a mom at a very early age. I had my son right after graduating high school.  While I had almost a full scholarship to college,  my dad died earlier that year and although I knew my sons father would always be there, I decided that I needed to find a job asap so I could support my son. As a minority, unwed, teen mother I could hear the words "STATISTIC"  screaming in my head,  so I had to get a job and prove to myself more than anyone else that I could be a great mother.

While all my friends were off to college,  I was off to work. I had no time to party or really even socialize. I wanted my family to work.   Truth is that between work , kids and working on our marriage,  friends were definitely the last thing on my list. They all moved on with their lives and I only keep in touch with a all handful of them.   Fast forward 15 years,  a marriage and two more kids later. I'm still working ,running errands,  with my kids and the spare time we have my husband and I try to spend together.  Be that as it may, my husband works so hard and for so many hours that our quality time is few and far in between.

Finally I have found myself going through life and all its curveballs and other wonderful and at times frustrating experiences and I needed an outlet.   I needed a way to convey everything I feel and all my questions without being interrupted and my poor husband can only handle so much of me so here I am. I look forward to seeing how this turns out.

Now if you made it to the end of this that means you've given me a few minutes of your time and I thank you.  I know this first post was long winded but I wanted to give you a sense of where I was coming from.   I promise to make future posts more concise and light hearted.  I hope you stay tuned.  :)